facts of life

Who Invented/Discovered?

  1. Paint
  2. Milk
  3. (and more importantly) Cheese
  4. Alcohol
  5. …or just all fermented foods
  6. jello (those murders…)
  7. fireworks
  8. chitlins (chitterlings)
  9. castor oil
  10. mirrors
  11. glass (i know it’s more than just burnt sand, but still…)
  12. porcelain
  13. ….or pretty much everything u have to burn UNDER HIGH HIGH HIGH HEAT for a while (instinctively, it would burn to a crisp, but no. Some forager had the bright idea to just let it burn and cool stuff was born) <pun intended>
  14. cutlery
  15. clocks (grr)
  16. hairbands (thank you!)
  17. putting messages in bottles and then pitching them into the sea
  18. waffles
  19. go-gurt
  20. tape

Just had to spread my incredulity far and wide!


Questions That Probably Don’t Have Answers but I’m Gonna Ask Them Anyway

  1. Does buttered toast land on the buttered side every time? …really…?
  2. What would it be like if colors had taste as well? (yes, i know about the frequency of light and photon emission….)
  3. Why does chewing gum get tough but blowing gum stays soft and sometimes falls apart? (maybe I should back off from sugarless gum)
  4. Why has classical music lasted? Older people must be really good at transmitting their culture, cause it’s been like hundreds of years (not complaining by the way, classical music is awesome)
  5. Who discovered milk? HOW? (my guess is that it saw the calf drinking milk from its mama and thought it’d be great to have milk even when you’re not a suckling infant)
  6. Cheese must have been an accidental discovery….right? So was alcohol…?
  7. Why even invent the viola (VIOLA’s AWESOME, THANKS FOR INVENTING IT)? They could’ve just adjusted the violin and made a 5-stringed instrument more like a viola; then, no more fighting over always getting the bad parts!
  8. Parents: why don’t you all embrace kids growing up? We’re not like birds, we won’t fly again and forget where we came and never come back from after a winter at the beach. Wait…
  9. Of what use is cursing? Are there just no words bad enough? Why does everyone eventually start cussin’? (SOCIETY AT LARGE ಠ_ರೃ)
  10. What’s the point in firing up divisions in people if you’re gonna make them stop short of overt action and just stick to insinuations and passive anger? Very annoying…
  11. Would the story have been different if Tesla and Edison were a pair: one does the inventions and the other turns the profits (and shares them equally; if he didn’t want to share, then the outcome is totally understandable.
  12. Why is it not okay for movies to have artistic license and change up the plot of the book they’re based on? I used to get so mad at this and then I realized (after watching a really good, but mixed up, version of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland the Ballet) that mixing up the plot CAN be okay. (Plus, i wasn’t like a huge Alice-hard fan)
  13. Why do some people hate certain textures of food? (hating creaminess, for instance, has kept me from enjoying ice cream and the like. I know…you can’t believe it)
  14. Shouldn’t we know, by know, the difference between stereotypes and reality and still allow both of them to exist?
  15. Why does kindness from strangers make us feel better than kindness from close relatives/friends
  16. Who noticed that the “Yes we can!” campaign slogan was stolen/adapted from the Bob The Builder theme song?
  17. Why do people go to movies that insult them/their demographic?
  18. Is polygamy bad? (no, i’m not a guy or a girl with issues)
  19. Why do new songs become ‘old’ a couple weeks after being released? Are they really that bad? really……? ¬_¬
  20. Is this true? Racism is like puberty, you get it when you “grow up” and it takes a while (sometimes never) to realize that you haven’t actually grown up and just think you have.
  21. Why does writing in a journal make me fall aslee…zzzz (note: true story, see phota)


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