Today was a day off. I was supposed to go the the circus with some friends. I woke up early (ON A DAY OFF!!!) and went down, only to have a friend tell me that they didn’t get my RSVP and there were no tickets.
So now what?! Everyone else was gone visiting family and the whole, silent campus presented itself to me as a boring and despondent captivity. I didn’t know what to do. I worked on some art, but felt bored and judged by people walking around. The silence was drilling into my head, drilling into my sanity. I couldn’t take it anymore, so I just got up and left. Good thing I brought money.
I decided to go to the loop (strip of stores off campus) and do some impulse shopping, get some food (since the dining hall was so empty), and look around. At first, I felt a little bad since I was alone and everyone was walking with friends all la-di-da. But, I grew to realize something. That I hadn’t enjoyed myself this much in a long time. Finally, I had peace and the ability to do whatever I wanted. I could follow my whims without needing to explain them to anyone, without needing to convince anyone to go to the art supply store or just walking around. Gone was the fear of being judged because…I wasn’t with anyone who cared. Strangers certainly didn’t care (thankfully). And I enjoyed being alone, no pressure.
The circus would’ve been interesting, but so is peace and solitude.
Btw, there’s a panera and a smoothie shop. Things are lookin’ up!